NEWS

 

6 June 2016


The new album by Simon J. Mills is now available to buy! It's a musical adaptation of Nigel Kneale's classic science fiction horror from the 50s/60s, re-imagined for the 21st century! Buy it NOW from 'SHOP'.

Hugs,

Si.

 


21 December 2015



The NEW ALBUM from SAGAN'S LOT is on sale NOW!!!   It is our fourth release, entitled "NEURASTHENIA", and is a concept album about the downward spiral of a troubled child into the realms of rape, murder, and eventually suicide.  

Buy it NOW from 'SHOP'.

Hugs,

Simon.



21 September 2015



My NEW SOLO ALBUM is on sale NOW!!!   "SIMON J. MILLS - GHOSTS OF WENLOCK EDGE" is thesequel to my 2010 album "WENLOCK EDGE". 

Buy it NOW from 'SHOP'.

Hugs,

Simon.





10 November  2014



My SECOND new album of 2014 is on sale NOW!!!   "SIMON J. MILLS - STONER SUB 69" is a black comedy concept album, based on my own short story of the same name.



STONER SUB 69

The submarine sank. Everyone screamed and shouted, because it should have been surfacing. Everyone except Rick Salamander, that is. He just dropped another tab of Belgian LSD and blew his nose on a passing janitor. 23 was a good age to hijack a submarine, he thought. No one dared come near him, as he was using an ancient Japanese facial expression to ward off demons, that he'd picked up on the last shore leave. Also, nobody seemed to notice that he was the only one not panicking. Captain Ahab Pistonblocker III was asleep in his cabin – as usual. He'd just downed 6 bottles of Jack Daniels, and so felt he deserved a short nap. This meant that he didn't notice Rick Salamander enter his domain, and proceed to shove two sugar cubes soaked in Guatemalan acid up each nostril. Rick wasted no time, and pressed the cabin microphone's 'on' switch. He cleared his throat. In a loud, fairly steady voice, he announced: “Do not be alarmed. The reason this submarine is sinking like a stone is due to my actions. I have sabotaged the nuclear reactor. We're going nowhere.” The screaming outside the cabin ceased. He continued: “I am Rick Salamander – head of the League of Thoth. You may have heard of me, as I am the man responsible for putting LSD into the water supply in the Sandy Bottom Old People's Home in Vermont. Anyway, the captain's on a permanent trip to nowhere, and I'm in command now. So here's the plan. Either you all agree to help me fight the aliens currently in the sky above us, or I'll knock you out with SX-59 gas. It's your choice.” Shouting erupted throughout the submarine. Rick let it die down, before marching back out of the cabin's door, and proceeding down the steps onto the main level. About fifty angry and confused crew members confronted him. He didn't even blink, saying: “OK guys – help me kick some alien butt. Here, swallow these Belgian LSD-laced sugar cubes.” He threw a handful out to the men at the front. Without thinking, they instinctively snatched them from the air, and popped them into their mouths. Such was the persuasive power of Rick Salamander. Almost immediately, their demeanour changed, and one said: “Cool, man! Yeah we'll help ya! Come on guys – let's go!” Rick threw out the remaining drugged sugar cubes to rest of the men. They wolfed them down, unthinkingly – and at once were converted to the religion of Thoth. These men would have no choice now, but to follow Rick Salamander as their spiritual guru. “OK” said Rick, “I've replaced the nuclear reactor with a device of my own – entirely powered by acid. It'll help us get to Morocco twice as fast. This is where the aliens have built their base.” “Where are the aliens from?” asked a crew member. “Titan” replied Rick, “moon of Saturn.” There was a collective gasp of wonderment. Rick produced a memory card from his pocket, and slammed it into a nearby console panel. At once, a video started playing on the screen above it. The assembled men gathered round, entranced. “Here's the operation, guys” he enthused, “Now this is the outcrop where the aliens have hidden their spacecraft. Observe closely. Notice that there are several metallic protrusions visible above the rock. It has been theorized that these are either aerials of some kind – or weapons. We are not going to take any chances, so the primary objective is to destroy these structures as soon as possible. Your standard issue rifles have been fitted with the latest laser blaster upgrades, so you should have no trouble hitting, and hopefully destroying the targets. Any questions?” A portly man in his fifties piped up. “Lord Salamander, how will we be approaching the alien camp – on foot?” Rick snorted. “No, of course not!” he said derisively, “we'll be using special Hover Carpets.” A murmur of appreciation. “These will carry each man towards the protruding structures, enabling a clear shot as you fly directly over them.” “I see!” said the portly man, a huge grin splitting his chubby face. Another man put up a hand. “Yes?” said Rick. “When does the operation start?” he asked. “NOW!” shouted Rick, and pressed a button on a nearby console. A huge screen erupted into life, showing the current surroundings of the submarine. They appeared to be close to a Moroccan beach, with medium-sized hills in the distance. The bright sunlight sparkled as it reflected from the strange silver towers partially obscured by the rocks. The submarine crew became animated, the LSD in their systems focusing their minds into a collective hive – committed to their mission. “OK!” shouted Rick, “Hover Carpets are on deck 3. Get your asses on them, and out there!” He punched his palm for effect. The crew scrambled out of the room, each saluting Rick with a peace sign. It wouldn't be long before they grew their hair, and started wearing sandals, he thought. Once he was alone, Rick pulled off his short hair wig, releasing his own luscious locks. They reached his bottom. With one dramatic movement, he removed his uniform, and unravelled the kaftan beneath. He felt himself again. Now – to work. Rick jogged up the steps to the bridge, where he switched on the observation screen. He watched the men disembarking, their Hover Carpets zooming off into the distance, towards the craggy hills. This was really a suicide mission, but they were expendable. The ones who survived would be good enough to form his own personal navy. He didn't need many people to fight the Titan Creatures – just good ones. Nobody on Earth really knew who Rick Salamander was. He had been called a con man, a confidence trickster, even a criminal – but his identity and motivations were a total mystery. Forever changing his appearance, the slippery hippie had travelled the entire globe, seeking the truth about the elite groups that actually ran the planet. Every conspiracy theory had been investigated, and most were dead ends – but finally, Rick had stumbled upon a plot to overthrow the invisible World Government, and replace it with aliens from Titan – who had been waiting on the Earth since 1947. The so-called “Roswell Incident” had heralded their arrival on our planet, as they crash-landed in the middle of the Nevada Desert. Now, twenty-two years later, they had been encouraged to emerge from their underground base, by a disgruntled US government employee, named Harpo Wexler. This evil man dreamed of ruling the entire planet, with these small grey creatures from Saturn's moon Titan as his army. He made a deal with them, killed their captors, and now was here in Morocco, building a gigantic weapon that could paralyse all the satellites orbiting the Earth in one go. But Rick Salamander was going to stop him. He had developed a new form of LSD so powerful that it could turn ordinary military men into devout hippie followers of the Thoth religion – and he was going to use this hijacked submarine crew to destroy Harpo Wexler and his alien lackeys. So far, the plan was going well. He could hardly believe how easily he had taken over the government submarine, and brainwashed the crew! But now came the difficult part – using the magick of Aleister Crowley to defeat alien technology... Rick had memorized all of Crowley's books (even his fiction), and was now a walking library of occult 'Magickal' practices. He had studied the great man's works for many years, and had found a way to harness the Thelemic powers therein, in order to control the minds of men - and even more amazingly – the physical properties of inanimate objects. He could now defy gravity itself, summoning Hover Carpets to fly! The question was, could Magick work through the remote-controlled minds of others? He was about to find out, as he stared intently at the screen before him. Tiny dots hung in the perfect blue sky, above the alien structure inhabited by Wexler and the Titan Creatures. These were the submarine's crew on their Hover Carpets, ready to strike! Rick knew he had to choose the moment carefully, when he would 'will' the hippie sailors to commence their assault. Beads of sweat formed on his forehead, and his palms were incredibly clammy. One chance. That's all they had. He waited. And waited. Finally, when the mystical power seemed ready to tear his head apart, Rick focused it upon his army of flying men. Suddenly, they dived in unison, firing their laser-rifles at the silver craft which hid like a gigantic crab on the Moroccan beach. Clouds of smoke erupted into the once clear sky, and bolts of energy rained down upon the target. Rick couldn't help whooping in sheer joy, as the men pummelled the structure relentlessly. Suddenly, he became aware of a huge metallic claw rising up towards the attackers. Fear gripped him, and he clung onto the control panel for support as his knees buckled. The flying men seemed initially shocked by the claw, and began retreating – but soon regrouped in order to fight it. The monstrous appendage opened, and began snapping at the tiny dots above it – squashing a few men to death instantly. Rick barely flinched. He merely increased the force of his Magickal Will, compelling the men to attack the robotic crustacean with renewed vigour. The alien structure truly was a giant crab! It was moving now, scuttling from behind the hills, to reveal its full magnificence in the fierce sunlight. With a few more snaps of its humongous pincers, the alien crab killed several hovering sailors – until one of them scored a direct hit on one of the beast's eye stalks! The whole machine lurched to one side, temporarily losing its footing in the shifting sand. Rick released a torrent of satisfied laughter, and dropped another tab of Venezuelan LSD. The scene before him intensified in colour – and if he could have heard it, sound too. In no time, the crab was back on its six hydraulic legs, and had begun scuttling towards the sea – and the submarine in which Rick sat. It was quite clear that if it managed to submerge, the vehicle would escape! Although a few hovering sailors were blasting the crab's fuselage, it appeared to be having very little effect. “Aim for the eye stalks!” screamed Rick, although he knew they could not hear him. Or could they? Suddenly, the circling men all began clustering around the stalks, concentrating their laser power into the huge lenses. As Rick watched in wonderment, the men on Hover Carpets totally obliterated both of the robotic crab's optical units, causing it to stagger blindly about the beach, chaotically crashing in and out of the waves. Before long, the metal legs buckled, and the massive crustacean collapsed onto the sand, gouging a huge crater. It lay motionless. Rick cheered. As one, the surviving sailors flew their Hover Carpets back to the submarine, and climbed back down into the bridge. They were ecstatic with the thrill of victory. “We did it, man!” whooped the small chubby sailor, and gave Rick a huge bear hug. “It's a pity that man escaped though!” said another. “What man?” snapped Rick. “The man in military uniform.” Rick snarled. “Harpo Wexler!” he spat. “Yeah,” continued the sailor, “we saw him fly out of the back of that crab thing – in some kinda escape capsule!” Rick shrugged and replied: “Never mind. You did your best, and all of the Titan Creatures are dead! It's gonna take a few years for Wexler to come up with another plan for world domination.” The group cheered once more, and began dancing around the bridge, doing the trendiest dance of 1969 – 'The Swim'. Rick was astounded at the change in their appearance. Each man now wore a long mane of hippie hair, a groovy beard, and was stripped to waist. The combined power of Crowley's Magick and Belgian acid had transformed them. As they clapped, danced and sang, Rick could see that their entire personalities had mutated irreversibly – they were now totally fab and groovy! With this elite navy of Stoners, he was unstoppable. The world was metaphysically his oyster!

THE END.



Visit the "SHOP", and buy it NOW, froods!!! \m/

Far Out,

Simon.





14 April 2014


Sagan's Lot: "Hallowed Patricide" is a concept album. Here's a track by track summary of the plot. 

"This Choirboy Speaks" - The main character remembers being sexually abused by a priest, as a child. 

"Awakenings" - He becomes an agnostic.

"Life On Europa?" - His growing interest in science replaces his religious faith, and he struggles with big questions - now as a free thinker.

"Hallowed Patricide" - He swears to undermine organized religion. 

"Sociopathic Savages" - His rejection of those who hate science and favour superstition.

"Fukushima Daiichi" - The Japanese tragedy convinces him that there is no God. He becomes an atheist.

"So Inconsequential" - His new world view.

"The Jars of Broca" - He becomes obsessed with neurology and its explanations of how the mind works.

"I, Asmodeus" - He undergoes a terrible flashback of his childhood abuse, and decides to hunt down the priest responsible. 

"The Great Desecration" - He carries out his plan - to its inevitable conclusion.

Sagan's Lot: "Hallowed Patricide" is released on 14 April by Barguest Records.


6 January 2014

My new album is on sale NOW!!!  

"SIMON J. MILLS - THE ECLIPSE OF REASON: AN AUDIENCE WITH THE DEAD" is an elegy for the human spirit.

Visit the "SHOP", and buy this CD - before the format (and Humankind) becomes obsolete.

Cynical regards,

Simon.


15 April 2013

The SECOND album by Simon J. Mills' Carl Sagan-inspired project Sagan's Lot, is on sale NOW!!!  

"POLLUTING SPACE" is a Progressive Metal album, exploring the negative forces threatening the progress of science in the 21st century.

Go to the "SHOP" now, and get ready for some serious headbanging!!! 

\m/

Simon.


24 December 2012

The FIFTH album by Simon J. Mills' steampunk project Steamprog, is on sale NOW!!!  

Entitled "LEWIS CARROLL'S PHANTASMAGORIA", it is a musical adaptation of Lewis Carroll's epic poem, about a man who finds that the ghost haunting him is just a humble soul, trying to earn a living.

This masterpiece is awaiting your pennies at the "SHOP" page - NOW!!!

Hugs,

Simon.


17 September 2012

The SEVENTH solo Simon J. Mills album is on sale NOW!!!  Called "THE GNOME SYMPHONY", it's a satirical concept album, exploring one man's flight from reality, thanks to mind-altering chemicals.  Here's the synopsis:

Mario Anah the Gnome, has a vision after taking some Magic Mushrooms, and then rides the Cosmic Hovermower to the field where Mrs. Slurpy the Cow lives. She gives him a ride on her back to a far off land - but gives birth to The Starcalf on the way...

The Starcalf tells Mario that he must find the great Wizard Splifftar, who sometimes takes the form of The Wonky Donkey – a humble beast of burden. He is to be found within the walls of the Heavenly Blue City. The strange old man must be convinced to help Mario defeat The Bongmeister General, who rules by the fear of Bad Trips. Only then may he return to the Ganja Garden, and his Gnome Home – a true Hero.

Buy it from "SHOP" NOW!!!

Hugs,

Simon.


6 August 2012

The debut album from my Carl Sagan inspired project SAGAN'S LOT, entitled "SAGAN'S LOT", is OUT NOW!!! 

Buy it from "SHOP" NOW!!!

Hugs,

Simon.



27 February 2012

Simon J Mills's 6th album,
"SUN STORMS ON VENUS", is released TODAY!!!

Buy it from 'SHOP' - NOW!!!

Help a Struggling Artist pay the rent.

Mega-Hugs,

Simon 'n' Sharon \m/(>.<)\m/




18 February 2012

Simon J Mills's 6th album,
"SUN STORMS ON VENUS", is released on 27 February 2012.

It will be available to buy from this website - just go to 'SHOP'.

Set the controls for the heart of the Sun...

Hugs,

Simon 'n' Sharon xxx :)))


9 January 2012

Steamprog's 3rd album,
"The Schüfftan Process", is released TODAY - 9 January 2012.  

Buy it NOW from 'SHOP'.

Happy New Year!

Simon 'n' Sharon xxxxx


19 December 2011



Steamprog's 3rd album,
"The Schüfftan Process" will be released on 9 January 2012.  Hear tracks as they are uploaded on the "STEAMPROG" page.


Merry Christmas!

Simon 'n' Sharon xxxxx




25 November 2011


It can't be denied that HG Wells was not a fan of the film "Metropolis".

But Steamprog feel he should not have dismissed it so lightly.  Fritz Lang's 1927 silent expressionist masterpiece builds on Wellsian themes, which first appeared in HG's novels "The Time Machine" and "The Sleeper Awakes" - and acts as a virtual template for Wells's own film "Things to Come" (1936).

The German Expressionist movement, of which "Metropolis" was a milestone, also produced such classics as "Faust" (1926), "Nosferatu" (1922) and the two Louise Brooks breakthrough works, "Pandora's Box" & "Diary of a Lost Girl" (both 1929).

Steamprog wish to pay an homage to this silent cinematic world of 1920's Germany, with an appropriate contemporary soundtrack.  Therefore, in January 2012, we shall release our third album, "The Schüfftan Process".

Music will be uploaded between early December and the end of January, when the album gets its physical release.

More news soon,
Simon and Sharon (Steamprog).


6 July 2011

Simon's new Ambient project "BAREFOOT FUTURE" is to release an album called "BAREFOOT FUTURE" on 11 July 2011.  This is music meant for meditation, consisting of one 46 minutes-long track of unbroken mood, entitled "Meditation No.1".  More albums are to follow later this year.  Have a listen to a 10 minute excerpt at:

http://alonetone.com/smillsoid/tracks

Hugs,

Simon xxxxx




20 June 2011

The new Simon J. Mills solo album "AUTOTHYSIS" is released TODAY.  Buy it now at 'SHOP'.

Hugs,

Simon xxxxx

 


30 May 2011

The new Simon J. Mills solo album, "AUTOTHYSIS" will be released on Monday 20th June 2011.  It is the follow-up to last year's smash hit, "Wenlock Edge".  Both albums can be purchased from 'SHOP'.  To hear new tracks as they are finished (and hear previous work), go to 'LISTEN'.

More news soon,

Simon xxx


14 March 2011

Two new albums available to buy NOW!:- STEAMPROG's "HG WELLS'S THE WAR IN THE AIR" and THE GRAVAMEN's "FEAR AND LOATHING IN GREENDALE" - what are you waiting for??!!

Go to SHOP to buy both of these discs!

Love and Hugs,
Simon xxxxx

 

4 February 2011

The second album by STEAMPROG entitled "HG WELLS'S THE WAR IN THE AIR" is released on 7 March 2011.  The work is a 'Steampunk' concept piece with full narration and sound effects.  It will be available to buy from this website.  To hear tracks as they are uploaded, go to the STEAMPROG page on this site, or go to:

http://www.reverbnation.com/#!/steamprog


Regards,
Simon.

 

 23 November 2010

The new album by CRM 114 entitled "Koshka" is now available to buy from

http://crm114.synthasite.com/Shop.php

And the new album by Kissyfoot entitled "Barefoot Concerto (for Ludwig van Beethoven)" will be released on 6th December 2010.  It will be available from

http://www.kissyfoot.org/Boutique.php

More news soon!

Si & Sharon xxxxxxxxxxx


17 September 2010

ONLY 9 COPIES LEFT of "Wenlock Edge" - Simon J. Mills' 2-part instrumental work in a progressive rock/classical style, priced £7.00 (plus postage and packaging) from 'SHOP.'  Buy now or be disappointed!

 

9 August 2010

"Wenlock Edge" - Simon J. Mills' 2-part instrumental work in a progressive rock/classical style, is out NOW - priced £7.00 (plus postage and packaging) from 'SHOP.'  The album has been produced in a strictly limited run of 20 numbered CDs - ONLY 16 LEFT!!!

 

15 July 2010

"Wenlock Edge (Special Edition)" - Simon J. Mills' 2-part instrumental work in a progressive rock/classical style, is now available for PRE-ORDER - priced £7.00 (plus postage and packaging) from 'SHOP.'  The album will only be produced in a strictly limited run of 20 numbered CDs - no purchases will be possible after stocks have sold out.

 

5 July 2010

Simon has started work on his 4th solo album (under the name Simon J. Mills), entitled "Wenlock Edge" a 2-part instrumental work in a progressive rock/classical style.  It marks a change in direction from the synth pop of "Delete Yourself," and is described by Simon as a "Hergest Ridge" (Mike Oldfield) for the 21st century. 

More details soon...

 

 


21 June 2010

The second album by The Gravamen, "The Gulch Confix" is released TODAY - Monday 21 June 2010.  It is available now to buy, from the 'SHOP' at this website, priced a measly £5.00.

Buy it - or the amoeba gets it,  

Simon Normal-Bunny (a.k.a. Lord Dada).

 

8 March 2010

Steamprog's debut album, "When the Sleeper Wakes" is released TODAY - Monday 8th March 2010.  It is available now to buy, from the 'SHOP' at this website, priced a mere £5.00.

Kindest Regards, 

Simon Jeremy Mills Esq.

 

3 March 2010

Steamprog's debut album, "When the Sleeper Wakes" will be released on Monday 8th March 2010.  It will be available to buy from the 'SHOP' at this website, priced a mere £5.00.

Regards, 

Simon Jeremy Mills Esq.

 

4 February 2010

Simon and his wife Sharon have embarked upon a new musical project, called "Steamprog".  Described by the duo as "21st Century progressive rock which has fallen through a wormhole, and ended up in the Victorian era", Steamprog is an exciting new departure into 'classical ambient' territory.  To listen to the first completed track, go to: http://www.myspace.com/steamprog - and revel in the majesty... 

Simon.

 

18 January 2010

Simon J. Mills' third solo album, "Delete Yourself" is released TODAY - January 18th 2010.  Go to "SHOP" to purchase the CD (only £5.00), and why not treat yourself to my other 2 solo albums whilst you're there?  It's a snip at a mere £15.00 (plus P&P).

Simon.

 

9 January 2010

The release of Simon J. Mills's third solo album, "Delete Yourself" has been put back - AGAIN - to January 18th 2010.  Sorry for the delay, but remember, a free download of the track "Reptile" from the album is available at: http://www.reverbnation.com/simonjmills

Thanks for your continuing patience.  It will be worth the wait.

Simon.

 

23 December 2009

The release of Simon J. Mills's third solo album, "Delete Yourself" has been put back to January 11th 2010.  However, a free download of the track "Reptile" from the album is available at: http://www.reverbnation.com/simonjmills

 

 18 November 2009

Simon J. Mills releases his third solo album, "Delete Yourself" on January 4th 2010.  More details to follow.

 

 22 June 2009

Simon J. Mills releases his second solo album, "Occult"  TODAY!!!  Buy it from the SHOP now.

 

26 May 2009

At last!  Simon J. Mills releases his second solo album, "Occult" - release date to be confirmed (possibly early June).  If you liked "Polarity", you'll flip out totally to this new disc!  Darker than its predecessor, "Occult" takes the listener down a winding path towards enlightenment, via loss, confusion, angst...but eventually joy.  It is dedicated to my wonderful fiancee - soon to be my wife - the gorgeous Sharon.  I love you so much!

Out on 8 June is the new Kissyfoot album "Sade's Philosophy in the Boudoir" - a terrifying concept album based on the twisted works of the Marquis de Sade.  If you like your sexy sounds dripping with blood, this is your lucky year!  Avant-garde in the extreme, and pushing the very limits of acceptability, "Sade's Philosophy in the Boudoir" will not only appeal to foot fetishists, but also anyone longing for music to challenge the listener to the point of perverse submission...

CRM 114 are preparing for the long-awaited British tour.  Dates soon!!!

 

 

 1 January 2009

Happy New Year, and welcome to this brand new webpage.  Henceforth, this site will be at the very heart of all things Simon J. Mills - be they to do with my new solo album "Polarity" (available for £5.00) from 'SHOP', or regarding other musical projects CRM 114, Kissyfoot, and The Gravamen.

CRM 114 will embark on a live tour soon, to promote 10 albums' worth of original material (see http://crm114.synthasite.com for details of how to buy our CDs).  Personal issues postponed last Autumn's proposed gigs.  So don't worry - you will get to see us live, eventually!

KISSYFOOT - the world's first foot fetish progressive rock band are currently planning a special erotic spectacular, designed for one-off performances at adult-themed events.  If feet are your thing, or you're just interested in taking a barefoot walk on the wild side, then check the band out at http://kissyfoot.synthasite.com - plus, why not buy our debut album "The Footlover's Guide"?  Don't be an arch enemy...

THE GRAVAMEN?  Watch this space.

Oh, and my novel "Denebola Six" (an Adams/Sheckley-esque sci-fi adventure) will be out in the Summer.